tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post4613181701059872125..comments2024-01-25T19:40:47.043-08:00Comments on Ex-Jehovah's Witnesses of Portland, Oregon: What am I Supposed to Do with All this Anger?Joel Gunzhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/02597499250122165168noreply@blogger.comBlogger13125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-84017260833766939782010-10-13T16:28:31.567-07:002010-10-13T16:28:31.567-07:00I enjoyed your perspective. It has been a little o...I enjoyed your perspective. It has been a little over a year since I left. I was very angry at myself for wasting my life. Now I am just angry because I cannot get the WTS out of my mind. I have come to realize that it will always be a part of me. Thank you for sharing your story.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-60759085644107880222010-04-08T09:53:56.303-07:002010-04-08T09:53:56.303-07:00Great post, Joel.
I spent a lot of time being ang...Great post, Joel.<br /><br />I spent a lot of time being angry at myself for becoming a witness in the first place. My parents came into the Borg when I was a kid, but I spent most of my teen years not living with them, which meant I was free from the religion. In an attempt to reconnect with them, I started studying again when I was 19 and then spent the next 20 years struggling as a witness. Even though I served as an elder and pioneer, I had a really hard time accepting many of the teachings, especially in areas where it seemed that the GB were dictating areas of my private life. Even now, I battle with regret over many opportunities and experiences lost because I was in the religion. But, I take solace in the fact that I am out now, older and wiser and I am doing all I can to make up for lost time and really enjoy my life and the people in it. It's nice to read the comments from others that are also trying to do the same thing. Life is good. Thanks for your blog. I appreciate it!kknoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-70148796210604236602010-04-07T18:29:48.160-07:002010-04-07T18:29:48.160-07:00I enjoyed reading your blog very much .I wish I co...I enjoyed reading your blog very much .I wish I could put my thoughts into words as well as you do . It has been five years since I walked out of the Kingdom Hall . I was very angry at first over the realization my whole life had been wasted in a lie . I want so badly to be able to have my anger heard and understood by those I thought were my Brothers and Sisters .Not that it would change anything other than maybe a feeling of validation.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-42668795630765612702010-04-07T12:50:36.925-07:002010-04-07T12:50:36.925-07:00One of the guys I kinda miss is a fellow named Chu...One of the guys I kinda miss is a fellow named Chuck, in Rivergate Congregation. He wore polyester highwaters, preached on the ships at Swan Island and placed hundreds of magazine a month in languages I'd never even heard of. He'd come back to coffee break smelling like seaweed and diesel fuel, with a sky-wide smile on his face. He was 11 times cooler than the pioneers and 8-1/2 times more rad than the hipsters on Mississippi Avenue. But then the elders told him to quit working the ships, basically, because they didn't like the cut of his jib. I never saw that sky-wide smile again.Joel Gunzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02597499250122165168noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-31598833196665850962010-04-07T12:27:52.169-07:002010-04-07T12:27:52.169-07:00Very interesting comments! Funnily enough, I start...Very interesting comments! Funnily enough, I started this blog because the treatment of ex-JWs by current members angers me. But I'm guessing you probably already figured that out. LOL<br /><br />BTW, My_Compass and Burgertime, I'm trying to figure out how to delete your removed comments, but I'm having browser issues and can't see the "trash can" icon.Joel Gunzhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02597499250122165168noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-48405385823472611152010-04-07T10:48:58.358-07:002010-04-07T10:48:58.358-07:00I agree wholeheartedly with your post. I hear man...I agree wholeheartedly with your post. I hear many people say they are "over it," but it is clear that they are not. We can try to fool ourselves, but it doesn't really work. We carry this religion's scars for all of our lives, but it doesn't mean we are not "healed." <br /><br />I, too embrace my anger, and try to use it in constructive ways--particularly in helping other exJWs find their own personal value. Anger can move us to action; and, for me, that is an important step in my own recovery.Stephanie Van Vreedehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/00365013869469626492noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-74002830464764666012010-04-07T08:31:18.976-07:002010-04-07T08:31:18.976-07:00I love how you said that you still want them to se...I love how you said that you still want them to see you as a person. The shunning takes away your humanity it seems. I feel very strongly about that statement. My parents have both shunned me off and on for the last 17 years. Loving them does make it difficult, if I didn't love or care...then it wouldn't hurt. I still want them to see me as their loving daughter. Successful in my career, a wonderful mother, someone who cares for her family and friends, and a lover of all humanity. But it seems as if they can not see past my apostasy or the fact that I left their religion of choice. Thanks for sharing your anger--feels good!!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-1168391180484221372010-04-07T08:10:06.773-07:002010-04-07T08:10:06.773-07:00I tried to troll this post and make fun of your sp...I tried to troll this post and make fun of your spelling but failed...<br /><br />Anyways I don't really agree. I think that when you move on, you do move on, on a personal level. Case in point me. I hold no anger toward the JW's, however I do not put up with their faulty logic.Burgertimehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17940981041463953272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-20916692899495649472010-04-07T08:08:17.206-07:002010-04-07T08:08:17.206-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Burgertimehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17940981041463953272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-48659203295032684192010-04-07T08:06:42.070-07:002010-04-07T08:06:42.070-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Burgertimehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17940981041463953272noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-90677504137977911572010-04-07T05:23:51.566-07:002010-04-07T05:23:51.566-07:00I agree with both of you. What complicates things ...I agree with both of you. What complicates things for me is that the anger is not one-sided. The continual anger I receive from my family for deserting them, and God, requires a constant acknowledgement and release from my life--because that is one kind of energy I don't want to walk around with. (Interesting how a religion which condemns witchcraft basically performs energy work on its former members that any self-respecting Wiccan would recognize as cursing or hexing...but that's for another time.)<br /><br />I am glad that a friend of mine in Minneapolis dragged me to the Zen Center and sat me down facing a wall for as long as it took to not only be honest with the anger I felt, but the anger I was receiving from former friends and family whom I still love and respect. <br /><br />I am also glad that I feel the freedom to wish them well and even pray for their welfare, although I know that my well-wishing would be offensive to some of them. But I am finally not afraid to act and feel in these ways because it is an affirmation of my own humanity. For too long have I not allowed myself to do this because of not wishing to offend them, yet how can love freely offered, with no expectations of anything in return, offend? <br /><br />If I ever learned anything in the organization, it was that we all have to make an accounting for ourselves in the end. I still believe that. I can't answer for my family or friends or any organization, but only for myself--but in the end, I hope to have answered rejection with dignity, indifference with compassion, and anger with love. Isn't that all that any of us can do?Janet McCandlashttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10909729757184248250noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-49777630943851854842010-04-07T03:53:12.456-07:002010-04-07T03:53:12.456-07:00So much for my attempts at anonymity (thank you, g...So much for my attempts at anonymity (thank you, google dashboard). Joel, any way you can delete my above not fully deleted post?<br /><br />Anyway, I agree it is perhaps the love that makes the anger the most difficult. Your childhood best friend? The older brother who drove your family home from meetings when you didn't have a car? Your parents? It would be easier to hate the Witnesses if they were all a group of thugs, not the people you'd loved and shared decades of life with. But the pain is meted out directly from the people you love the most, and it's a conundrum I don't think my brain cares for much.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8467637497650166727.post-35716513631187392352010-04-07T03:45:50.379-07:002010-04-07T03:45:50.379-07:00This comment has been removed by the author.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com